Wednesday, November 10, 2010


Anytime you move to a new place, you have to reestablish your social life. I should know, I've lived in several places, and have made some amazing friends. I'm finding, however that as I move through different stages in life, making friends is becoming increasingly more difficult.

When I was in college I met people in class. It was easy to find friends when we were all in the same place in life. I made my best friends in graduate school though.

I decided that I needed a big change in my life after being out of college for a year and being in the workforce so I applied for graduate school. The one I eventually chose was the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis. Now, I grew up in Southern California and had never lived anywhere else, this was going to be a HUGE change. I did not know one person in Minnesota but I decided that this was going to be a great adventure. As it turns out, I met my very best friend in the whole world in Minnesota, Brigitt. I miss her so much I'm tearing up writing this.

I got married right after grad school, and moved to Louisiana. Wow, very different than any place I had ever been. It was easier for me not having my friends around then, because my husband is my best friend! We had so much fun spending time together that year. I also had a job where I interacted with people everyday, so I got to be social with others also. Even though my husband and I have moved a couple of times since then, it has been pretty much the same. I got to see Brigitt every once in a while, had some social acquaintances at work, and we have had each other.

Enter the kiddos. I thought marriage was a life changer. Well nothing prepared me for having children! At first I was too tired to worry about not having friends, but now it has snuck up on me. You see, I don't even really get my hubby to myself anymore. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE being a Mom, but I need to be Katie too. And Katie is a social person.

So, how do you make friends when you have twins under 2? Can't go to Mommy and Me classes because you need one parent for each kid and they don't offer classes in the evenings or weekends. It is really difficult to join a playgroup when you don't know anyone who is already there, especially when you are bringing 2 little monkeys with you.

Here is what the hubby and I have come up with:

1. We are making friends with people he works with. It has been fun going on some "triple dates" you know, My hubby and I, the couple from work, and our twins. They are too young to object to being each other's date for now. :)

2. We accepted an invitation to church. Who knows, we may meet some life-long friends there!

3. We called up friends we had BT (Before Twins) and really have made an effort to get together with them.

4. This is the most important... After we put the kids to bed in the evening, we turn off the TV and eat dinner together, Just the hubbs and I. We have adult conversation, play games, and remember why we love each other so much.

In all of this, I'm remembering what it is like to be me again. It feels good.

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